Thursday, February 8, 2018

Day 39: Flooding thoughts (Part 2: Dadaist style: Wave)

However, life finds a way to hate me
sought where the grass in greener
Jumped fences, crossed bridges
built fences, Burned bridges
All my life I tried to fit in

Adjusting to the lifestyle different from before
Every big decision leads to another disaster
Pieces of my life puzzle doesn't fit
changing masks, trading faces
Curving smiles, carving scars

But please keep in mind that I didn't as for more
This world took more then it gave
so pleased don't demand from me
I didn't ask for too much
I have my family yes,

So in one time that it was in a brink of destruction
Outside my family, people are rarely nice to me
the people around me decided they hate me.
My family in a brink of being broken
Fate decided to make a joke

It would kill me to have to stay trapped
It led me to continuous troubles
Speaking my heart out was false
I use to say what I need to say 
So I can walk away

Now I'm a cynic and a jerk and insensitive
I walk away before I could get involved
I held my tongue, bind my thoughts
And ignored those he needed me
Now I speak "I don't care"

"I'm here" and "Don't care" utters differently
yet the impacts remains the same
Where do I place myself?
I've always had it rough
Feeling I had enough

All they did is give me bruise
So go ahead all cut me loose
Every time I'm not of use
everyone has been a ruse 
this life I didn't choose

But you can't erase what's wrote in ink
And I'm still holding to that brink
If it's all a joke,  give me a wink
I just hope everything will sync
But my world has yet to shrink

Maybe some things can't be take back
I've never had fixing knack
like a carving on a plaque
I cannot mend the crack
Just let out!

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