Jollibee Calapan

As I arrive in the place where we first met

I look around with all the feelings left

Then I slowly reminisce

How perfect things back then

We were set for something beautiful

The start of a story that could've bloom

Now that's all in the past

I guess that happiness, wasn't meant to last

I sat on the chair where I saw you first

Across the table, a moment never missed

I still remember how soft your smile that night

As you greet and stretched your hand 

How vividly I remember everything

The noise, the lights, and the anxiety

How I wish I was trapped in that moment

And simply live that time we spent

I could still feel my hands shaking

Sweat around my forehead dripping

How I wish to make the best first impression

And how I wished we went more from that moment on

Now we live in the card dealt by fate

As I can only live in the fantasies I create

Maybe it wasn't meant to be everlasting

God simply gave me a taste of what happiness feels

And now I order that very meal

Along with the feelings that I feel

How I crave to live that night again

Maybe I'd do things differently, and my heart be spared

Maybe I'll try again in some time

And if destiny allows, another lifetime

Still I wish there's something more

But as I take my order to go

I leave my heart here, nothing more

Then finally start to move on

Puyat

Baka naman wala talagang tamang oras o pagkakataon

Na nakalaan para sa kwento na ito

Baka kahit maghintay ako ng isang daang taon

Ay mauulit lang ang mga nangyari noon

Hindi sa mali o hindi tugma ang panahon

O kaya sabihin pa natin na masyado pang maaga

Hindi sa hindi pa tayo handa

Sadyang hindi tayo para sa isa't isa

Walang bituin sa langit ang nagdidikta

Wala sa mga guhit ng kapalaran

Kalokohan lahat nang nasa baraha

Dahil hindi naman talaga tayo ang nakatadhana

Baka sa libro ng pag ibig nating dalawa

Sa akin ay pinupuno mo ang ilang kabanata

At sayo na nakaakda

Ako ay isang simpleng pangungusap lamang

Wag ka naman mag alala

Walang pait o paninisi akong nadarama

Mabuhay na lang tayo sa reyalidad

Na walang kinabukasan na para satin nakalaan

Pandang Gitab

 The blanket of stars could not compare

Or even the moon, with the light they share

In an evening where all the lights are intense

Your eyes outshines, being the brightest

All the candles and bulbs have been shining brilliant

And all the celestial bodies above glowing radiance

But even with all these pretty lights

The most beautiful shine around is your smile

First time that I'll see you in this eternity

How I wish for it to be a proper beginning to our story

I hope in person, my feeling will properly translate

Towards a new word in which we will create

I like to know every bit of you in time

If ever the future will be so kind

I don't know what the future has in sight

Bur for tonight, let us enjoy the festival of lights

I didn't mind the wait

I didn't mind the quiet nights

No message as days go by

I have all the patience in the world

As long as you say you would too

The anxiety of what may come

May have built up inside

But I didn't mind all of that

As long as you're coming back

The pain is all mine

But I never thought it was unfair

We all need time

To piece our life together

But then I saw you again

Energy surrounding have changed 

What I realized instead

Is that you sounded better in my head

As I let go what I feel for long

I will do what I should've done much soon

Something I should've realized back in June

There's a reason we only look at the moon

 

If by some miracle

If by some miracle, chance, or twist of fate that you find yourself looking for love... Please look for me. If one day you wake up and feel like you're ready to take a leap with some. I hope that someone is me. Admittedly, I've been trying to let you go along everything I feel about you. Unsuccessful I was, in many times. But I know one day I'll wake up without a single thought of you in mind. But if you do change your mind. If you feel like the time is right. If you feel like your life has been sorted out. Please take the risk with me. I'll get your coat, serve you tea, and offer you snacks. I'll welcome you back as if you've never left.

Pre-departure

Many months, I longed for something more

Than what we had before

Accepting that you left and closed the door

And gave up hope, forevermore

Stubborn I was, I then asked God

To see you again, for one last chance

And clarify where things went wrong

To myself improve even more

Six months later, he heard my prayer

And there you are, beautiful as ever

How the sun kissed you auburn hair

The same person I'll fall for over again

But as loud as I was, I was kept silent

As I fail to approach what I always wanted

Frozen in place in a place so crowded

I focus on other things on my end

Then the day comes, I muster up courage

To approach you, and left my baggage

I knew then, it was never the same

But stubborn I was, I tried anyway

Now this is the moment I waited for months

I have done my best not to lose this chance

Now I seat beside you near

Hard beats of my heart I feel

Rather than chase, what was lost

I simply asked where I went wrong

Baffled I was, you said nothing more

Then I realize my greatest woe

You can do all the steps of notion

And perfectly execute, your plan of action

Even with perfect execution

You simply cannot avoid frustration

And so as we talk, we drift away

As the silence in this corner was embraced

The bustling crowd of this airport

Is silenced to my very core

How stupid I was to bargain

To a decision you are already certain

But I accept this twist of fate

I already got what I wished for anyway 

Finally, I can close this chapter of my life

No more what ifs, or maybe wrong time 

Six months of agony was finally over

My made up romance, drains in the sewer

And so I sat beside you diligently

As I wait for the plane to arrive

I may never get my perfect ending

But atleast the next 10 minutes are mine

You sounded better in my head

Maybe you weren't meant to be together

And the idea of that person

Was merely imagination

It was never mutual

It was never moving forward

You made a book out of a sentence

Now the plot has nowhere to go

To live and accept that it's not them

That you'll end up with

Eases that pain bit by bit

You never stood a chance

Because you were never given 

It was all in your head

Purely one sided

Now you live with that reality

And move on

Out of your head

And into the world

Live, just for today

Shhhhh settle down

Let your body sink in

In that age old mattress

Hush! Your wandering thoughts

Feel things deeply

And succumb to the feelings

Embrace it all today

The shame, exhaustion, and anxiety

Hold on to it and slowly let go

One day it'll be over

Better than today

But for today, live

The path with no end

I travelled this path for so long

Now I think, if this path is wrong

Looking back at what it cost

All this time, was I just lost?

The path I trekked all this time

Looking back, was so unfamiliar

Even the sky above in sight

I don't remember when it was bright

Do the trees whisper this loud?

I'm alone, why do I hear a crowd?

Every step I feel my feet sinking

I can't recall when I was stepping on concrete

Now I strive to see the end

To silence the voices I heard

I don't know what will come ahead 

Or if I'll arrive before I'm dead

Prison of my making

Fantasies inside my head 

Never left the feel of dread

These mistakes will keep piling up

And these errors I will suck up

The constant horror playing

Will bleed on me repeatedly

Rainbow tears flooding my lungs

I wish to get out of this

It'll be fine someday they said

I just hope I'm still there,

In that someday they said

Recently, I turned twenty-four

How foolish I was growing up

Wishing I was an adult soon enough

Imagining all these wild scenarios

As if adulthood is devoid of woes

Recenlty I turned twenty-four

I have been carrying more than I ask for

Far from the childhood fantasies before

I live in this constant dread and horror

A lot of things are in my mind

Bills, work, and responbilities of any kind

Intrusive thoughts in my mind dances

Disrupting the rest I rarely have chances

But I can't complain, I have to work

I need to keep up with this fast-paced world

Because a lot is relying on my shoulder

I have no room to fail or falter

I am tired to my very core

Day by day my mind is running more

One day my body will submit

To this tiredness, that I can't accept

Can I not be me for just a single day?

For a single day, I don't want to be myself

Can everything be someone else's problem

Can I let things go, for just a single day

Will my dreams even reach the heights?

Or is everything here just pointless exercise

Can anyone assure me that everything in motion

Will soon enough come into fruition

One day, I want to date again

And meet all the friends I lost along the way

Experience new things for the first time

And meet the people I'll keep for a lifetime

All these thoughts I am panicking for

Intrusive thoughts so uncalled for

Seems silly looking at the bigger picture

What was I worried for

I'm only twenty-four

Stars on my palm

If I could reach up and hold a star

For everytime you made me smile

The entire evening sky

Would be at the palm of my hand

Then at my palm

There will be lines 

Of stars I own

And constellations

All of them 

Will align

As I wish to them

For you be mine 

Things I look forward with you

I wonder how pretty you are

Under a moonshine

And how you would looks so fine

When we dance under the stars

I wonder how you hand feels

When they clasped with mine

Or how heavy your head is

When you lay upon my shoulder

I wonder how we are

When we try to dance

Will you trip on my feet

Or we'll sway so gracefully 

Still I wonder if you are in my reach

Or just my perfect fantasy

I want to laugh gleefully

When you have something stuck in your teeth

I wonder what kinds of food

You will order on our dates

How do you like your coffee brewed?

Or what flavor of slice of cake

I look forward to stare into your eyes

And get lost in the moment

I wonder how pretty watching the sunset

Through the reflection of your eyes would be

It's a stretch by a long mile

But I wonder how it feels

When your lips are pressed to mine

I look forward to the things we want to do

And those we'll do

We don't even know we want to do

I wanna see the world with you by my side

I want to watch it spin

As reflected in your eyes 

Sa paksa ng pag-ibig

Asul na langit

Sa braso nakakapit

Sandal sa balikat

Mahihigpit na yakap

Matatamis na ngiti

Araw-araw na pagpili

Pagkaing pinagsaluhan

Gabi-gabing usapan

Paglimot ng kahapon

Pag buo ng hinaharap

Mapait ay tinapon

Buong buo tinanggap

Kasama sa pangarap

Planong di nagtugma

Damdamin unti unting nawawala

Ang kumukupas ay pinilit

Ngunit umihip ang hangin

Masakit na biro ng tadhana

Isang araw nagising ako na

Oo kaharap kita

Pero hindi na kita kilala

Malugod kong aaminin

Di ako sayo magdadalawang isip

Noon, ngunit sa ngayon

Kahit aking ipilit

Sa paksa ng pag-ibig

Hindi kana dumadampi

Sa aking isip

Pista ng mga ilaw

Sa pagyakap ng dilim

Panahon ng kulimlim

Ay nagkalat na sinag

Na pista ng liwanag

Malawak na paligid

Panahon ay mainit

Hindi inalintana

Nang ikaw na ay nakita

Sa ingay ng mga tao

Pagsabog at tinis ng mikropono

Lahat ay tumahimik

At ikaw lamang ang inisip

Sa ilang mundo na pwede magtagpo

Ibinigay satin ang panahong ito

Sa unang pagkikitang tunay

Hudyat sa simula ng habang buhay

Sa pistang nakakasilaw

Ang nakita ko ay tanging ikaw

Sa patimpalak at punyagi

Nawala ako sayong mga ngiti

Masikip at mainit man ang pwesto

Nadadanggil at natutulak ng mga tao

Hindi ko na ininda

Sapagkat sa wakas katabi na kita

To my younger self

I'll forever grieve what could've been

Endless possibilities, I'll forever think

Lamenting the times I should stand up

Rather I choose to obey and shut up

If I had guts way before

Resentment I had is not this more

Learning to let fo of what bothers me

Is a skill beyond my poetry

So I'll grieve and weep my younger self

And wish to myself I could be of help

But the past that's lost is already there

So I'll build the future we can happily share 

In another lifetime

Our past selves waited so long

To find each other

And it's up to us to go on

What they wish they had forever

Maybe you we're out of my reach

In the previous lifetime atleast

But now I found you after so long

I'm not letting you go

And let's be realistic

As nothing in this world is certain

We may never work out 

No matter how much we like

If ever that happens

I promise in time

I'll find you again

In another lifetime

Island Girl (Golden shovel)

Never I have been happy in my wake 

I scorn the days I have to get up

Days went by, I have nothing to feel 

Thinking I have nothing to go on, the 

Idea I'm disposable sweeps in the air 

Then one fateful night that 

Is dark and cold I'm 

Looking for some to talk to, heavy breathing

Thinking I could never find that someone, I 

Immediately sparked a conversation that can't 

Be topped and it's lovely how she explain 

Things that feels mundane, this 

Person gave me a feeling 

A sense of joy that 

Is maybe temporary or not but I'm 

Happy with what I'm feeling

Credits: Without You by AJ Rafael

Ang Pirata at Sirena

Mahabang paglalakbay ang dinayo ng pirata

Mga yamang naipon mula sa bawat isla

Mga kaibigan na iniwan at nakasama

Ngunit sa kabila nang naipon na karunungan

Ramdam sa loob niya may kulang

Malawak na karagatan ang bahay ng sirena

Maaari siyang pumili sa libo libong isda

Ngunit walang pumapasa sa kaniya

Kaya sa mahabang panahon na namuhay siya

Ay mas minarapat na lamang niya magisa

Ang pirata ay maraming naimpok

Sa haba ng panahon na sa barko siya'y nagsubok

Kasamaha'y umusad na sa sari sariling buhay

Mula noon ang ating pirata ay nalumbay

Walang kapantay ang ganda ng sirena

Ngunit tila walang nakakakita

Karagatan man ay malawak ay walang kawangis

Alam ng sirena na siya ay may ninanais

Isang araw sa daungan ng barko

Ang ating malungkot na pirata ay naupo

Itinali niya ang angkla sa huling pagkakataon

At pinili niyang manatili sa tahimik na nayon

Niyakap niya ang kaniyang pagiisa

Kasama ang yaman na naipon nya

Dun naisip ng pirata, na aanhin niya lahat ito

Kung sa pag waldas ay wala siyang kasalo

Hanggang napadpad sa dalampasigan ang sirena

At madali siyang napansin ng pirata

Agad nitong napansin ang sugat sa braso

Na dulot daw ng isang salbahe na tao

Ginamot at tinapalan ng pirata ang sugat

Sabay ang sirena ay mariing nagpasalamat

Mula noon sila ay palaging nasa dalampasigan

At kung anu ano na ang kanilang pinaguusapan

Di tumagal tibok ng puso nila ay naging isa

Tila ang mundo ng pirata ay nagkahulugan

Pakiramdam nilang lumiit ang karagatan

Ang buong mundo ay nasa dalampasigan

Ninais na nilang magsama

Ngunit hindi ito ninais ng tadhana

Sapagkat pag ang sirena ay iniangat papunta sa lupa

Siya ay nahihirapan nang makahinga

Ito rin ang problema ng pirata

Na sa ilalim ng tubig hindi niya kinakaya

Sa gitna ng bagyong ito kanilang napagtanto

Na silang dalawa ay nasa magkaibang mundo

Sa maliit na dalampasigan sila na ay nakuntento

Inagaw ang maliliit na pagkakataon 

Sapat na sa kanila at sa tadahana'y walang tampo

Ngunit hindi nila alam na ito'y magbibiro

Isang araw sa nayon ang pirata umubo

At kasama sa dinura niya ay mayroong dugo

Alam niyang bilang na ang oras niya sa mundo

Ngunit hindi niya masabi ang balitang ito

Dumalang na ang pagkikita nila

At tuluyang nag alala ang ating sirena

"Nawala na ba ang damdamin niya?"

Ang mga bagay na bumabagabag sa kaniya

Naisip niya na kahit malawak ang karagatan

Ay hahanap hanapin niya ang pirata

Kaya kahit hirap siyang makausap sa lupa

Ay sinikap niyang humanap ng balita

Hanggang isang araw sa may dalampasigan

Ay dalawang babae na lumapit sa sirena

Inabot nila ang isang papel sa loob ng botelya

At dun na nagsimula tumulo ang kaniyang luha

"Pasensya na mahal kong sirena

Kung nababasa mo ito, mundong ibabaw ako'y wala na

Hindi ko ninais ang aking kinasadlakan

Sadyang masakit ang biro sa atin ng tadhana

Pero salamat na rin sa kaniya

At sa akin ipinakilala ka niya

Maigsi man ang ating pagkakataon

Binigyan mo ko ng habang buhay sa isang taon

At kung mabibigyan pa ako ng pagkakataon

Ay hahanapin kita sa ibang panahon"

Tumulo sa dagat ang luha ng sirena

Sabay niyakap ang hawak niyang botelya

Lumangoy siya patungo sa pagsikat ng araw

At wala na muli sa kaniyang nakakita

Cosmic power

In the billion years

This universe exists

How lucky am I to live

In the era that you breathe

In the billion population

That surrounds every nation

Lucky I am to exist

In the same area you are in

How lucky I am to feel in love

Where I thought I'd go numb

In all the time we could know each other

We met in the time where it would matter

Some higher power

Truly wanted us together

Because if one second was off

None of this would work

So I thank the gods

And everyone there is

Because despite the odds

I live in a time 

Where you exist

Healing

What I gravely lack

Is what I hope you find

May you heal from the scars

That I, myself caused for

The love you always crave

The one I never gave

I hope you find in your care

That it was already there

I root for your healing

And embrace your feelings

I hope tomorrow shines

And once again, you smile 

Back then, I love you best

We only failed to sustain

Despite our hardest

And I apologize for the pain

You'll get the love you deserve

The same way I'll have mine as well

I'll always pray for you, even apart

Because for one moment in this lifetime

You had my heart

A bit of longing for today

Never will I ever surprise you

Of gifts you never knew

Nor watch a live basketball game

While cheering on the team of same

Guess I will forever look over your grave

As a visit to the cemetery is all I could give

We'll never color the world someday

Only your tombstone I can paint

So I lament the years to come

As success will be in unexpected sum

But all you will ever be

Is a bitterweet memory

Full of you

My hands long to hold another

As one fits in, not I remember

I crave the pieces of ourselves

Fitting in perfect and seamless

I chase the moment and the thrill

How I long to feel another feel

But then we slowly fell apart

Until both fell out of love

Long I built myself of mess

Brain wired in, in game of chess

Then I realize these past few days

Your presence here, is what I crave

Myself, I hardly knew

I long for you, as long I've known

My heart is full of you

I can hardly call it my own

Top

The top is a lonely place

Of which I forever chase

But is loneliness where I belong?

What if all this time, I was wrong

I never sought company of another

Nor kept memories to remember

Every moment fleeting by

Is a memory I often deny

Did I really crave this isolation

Or the feeling has been too familiar

That in my hastiest intuition

I run to it like a safety scarf

Replaced

I'll always have this constant fear

Of being replaced

When someone better

Is really near

Someone to snatch my place

Take my gains

And run away

Or be left out

Without wondering about

How I would feel

If they all just leave

To be left alone

When push come to shove

Is the fear I have most

So I live everyday

As if I need something to prove